Friday, December 18, 2009

Editing - Friday

Following is a paragraph with approximately 5-7 errors. Please copy and paste the paragraph into the comment box and make all necessary corrections. By the time you post your response, all corrections should have been made.

Please note: this paragraph will change daily. You must complete the editing process for two of the paragraphs this week. That means that you must do the homework on two separate days. There will be no comment back to another student this week, just the two responses. If you complete more than 2 responses, your top two scores will count.

Here is the paragraph:

Early mornings on her father's Montana ranch are the time that Ellen enjoys the most. Just after sunrise, she walks eagerly, down the dirt road behind her house to feed the horses. after she feeds them, she saddles up her most favorite mare for a brisk ride. She feels wonderfully alive as she and the horse raced across the green fields. The sound of singing birds is music to her ears. Ellen leans down and gently pats her horse on the neck. "Sasha that was a wonderful ride. Let's head back, she whispers." Sasha tosses her head as if in agreement, and the two of them begin a gentle stroll back to the barn.

24 comments:

  1. Early mornings on her father's Montana ranch are the time that Ellen enjoys the most. Just after sunrise, she walks eagerly, down the dirt road behind her house to feed the horses. after she feeds them, she saddles up her most favorite mare for a brisk ride. She feels wonderfully alive as she and the horse raced across the green fields. The sound of singing birds is music to her ears. Ellen leans down and gently pats her horse on the neck. "Sasha that was a wonderful ride. Let's head back, she whispers." Sasha tosses her head as if in agreement, and the two of them begin a gentle stroll back to the barn.








    Early mornings on her father's Montana ranch are the time's that Ellen enjoy the most. Just after sunrise, she walks eagerly, down the dirt road behind her house to feed the horses. after she feeds them, she saddles up her most favorite mare for a brisk ride. She feels wonderfully alive as she and the horse raced across the green fields. The sound of singing birds is music to her ears. Ellen leans down and gently pats her horse on the neck. "Sasha that was a wonderful ride, Let's head back, she whispers." Sasha tosses her head as if in agreement, and the two of them begin a gentle stroll back to the barn.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Early mornings on her father's Montana ranch there are times that Ellen enjoys the most. Just after sunrise, she walks eagerly down the dirt road behind her house to feed the horses. After she feeds them, she saddles up her most favorite mare for a brisk ride. She feels wonderfully alive as she and the horse raced across the green fields. The sound of singing birds is music to her ears. Ellen leans down and gently pats her horse on the neck. "Sasha that was a wonderful ride. Let's head back," she whispers. Sasha tosses her head as if in agreement, and the two of them begin a gentle stroll back to the barn.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Early morning on her father's Montana ranch is the time that Ellen enjoys the most. Just after sunrise she walks eagerly down the dirt road behind her house to feed the horses. After she feeds them, she saddles up her most favorite mare for a brisk ride. She feels wonderfully alive as she and the horse raced across the green fields. The sound of singing birds is music to her ears. Ellen leans down and gently pats her horse on the neck. "Sasha that was a wonderful ride. Let's head back, she whispers." Sasha tosses her head as if in agreement, and the two of them beginning a gentle stroll back to the barn.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Early morning on her father's Montana ranch is the time that Ellen enjoys the most. Just after sunrise she walks eagerly down the dirt road behind her house to feed the horses. After she feeds them, she saddles up her most favorite mare for a brisk ride. She feels wonderfully alive as she and the horse raced across the green fields. The sound of singing birds is music to her ears. Ellen leans down and gently pats her horse on the neck. "Sasha that was a wonderful ride. Let's head back, she whispers." Sasha tosses her head as if in agreement, and the two of them beginning a gentle stroll back to the barn.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Early mornings on her father's Montana ranch are the time that Ellen enjoys the most. Just after sunrise, she walks eagerly, down the dirt road behind her house to feed the horses. after she feeds them, she saddles up her most favorite mare for a brisk ride. She feels wonderfully alive as she and the horse raced across the green fields. The sound of singing birds is music to her ears. Ellen leans down and gently pats her horse on the neck. "Sasha that was a wonderful ride. Let's head back, she whispers." Sasha tosses her head as if in agreement, and the two of them begin a gentle stroll back to the barn

    ReplyDelete
  6. Early mornings on her father's Montana ranch are the times that Ellen enjoys the most. Just after sunrise, she walks eagerly down the dirt road behind her house to feed the horses. After she feeds them, she saddles up her most favorite mare for a brisk ride. She feels wonderfully alive as she and the horse raced across the green fields. The sound of singing birds is music to her ears. Ellen leans down and gently pats her horse on the neck. "Sasha that was a wonderful ride. Let's head back, she whispers." Sasha tosses her head as if in agreement, and the two of them begin a gentle stroll back to the barn.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Early mornings on her father's Montana ranch are the time that Ellen enjoys the most. Just after sunrise she walks eagerly down the dirt road behind her house to feed the horses, after she feeds them, she saddles up her most favorite mare for a brisk ride. She feels wonderfully alive as she and the horse raced across the green fields. The sound of singing birds is music to her ears. Ellen leans down and gently pats her horse on the neck. "Sasha that was a wonderful ride”. “Let's head back” she whispers. Sasha tosses her head as if in agreement, and the two of them begin a gentle stroll back to the barn.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Early mornings on her father's Montana ranch are the time that Ellen enjoys the most. Just after sunrise, she walks eagerly down the dirt road behind her house to feed the horses. After she feeds them, she saddles up her favorite mare for a brisk ride. She feels wonderfully alive as she and the horse race across the green fields. The sound of singing birds is music to her ears. Ellen leans down and gently pats her horse on the neck. "Sasha, that was a wonderful ride. Let's head back," she whispers. Sasha tosses her head as if in agreement, and the two of them begin a gentle stroll back to the barn.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Early mornings on her fathers Montana ranch is the time that Ellen enjoys the most. Just after sunrise, she walks eagerly down the dirt road behind her house to feed the horses. After she feeds them she saddles up her favorite mare for a brisk ride. She feels wonderfully alive as she and the horse race across the green fields. The sound of singing birds is music to her ears. Ellen leans down and gently pats her horse on the neck. " Sasha that was a wonderful ride. Let's head back.” She whispers. Sasha tosses her head as if in agreement and the two of them begin a gentle stroll back to the barn.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Early mornings on her father's Montana ranch are the time that Ellen enjoys the most. Just after sunrise, she walks eagerly down the dirt road behind her house to feed the horses. After she feeds them, she saddles up her most favorite mare for a brisk ride. She feels wonderfully alive, as she and the horse raced across the green fields. The sound of singing birds was music to her ears. Ellen leans down, and gently pats her horse on the neck. " Sasha, that was a wonderful ride. Let's head back, she whispers." Sasha tosses her head as if in agreement, and the two of them begin a gentle stroll back to the barn.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Early mornings on her father's Montana ranch are the time that Ellen enjoys the most. Just after sunrise, she walks eagerly down the dirt road behind her house to feed the horses. After she feeds them, she saddles up her favorite mare for a brisk ride. She feels so alive. The horse races across the green fields. The sound of singing birds is music to her ears. Ellen leans down and gently pats her horse on the neck. "Sasha that was a wonderful ride. Let's head back, she whispers". Sasha tosses her head as if in agreement, and the two of them begin a gentle stroll back to the barn.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Early mornings on her fathers' Montana ranch is the time that Ellen enjoys the most. Just after sunrise, she walks eagerly, down the dirt road behind her house to feed the horses. After she feeds them, she saddles up her most favorite mare for a brisk ride. She feels wonderfully alive as she and the horse race across the green fields. The sound of singing birds is music to her ears. Ellen leans down and gently pats her horse on the neck. "Sasha that was a wonderful ride. Let's head back, she whispers." Sasha tosses her head as if in agreement, and the two of them begin a gentle stroll back to the barn.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Early mornings on her father's Montana ranch are the times' that Ellen enjoys the most. Just after sunrise she walks eagerly down the dirt road behind her house to feed the horses. after she feeds them, she saddles up her most favorite mare for a brisk ride. She feels wonderfully alive as she and the horse race across the green fields. The sound of singing birds is music to her ears. Ellen leans down and gently pats her horse on the neck. "Sasha that was a wonderful ride."
    "Lets' head back." She whispers." Sasha tosses her head as if in agreement, and the two of them begin a gentle stroll back to the barn.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Early mornings on her father's Montana ranch are the times that Ellen enjoys the most. Just after sunrise, she walks eagerly down the dirt road behind her house to feed the horses. After she feeds them, she saddles up her most favorite mare for a brisk ride. She feels wonderfully alive as she and the horse raced across the green fields. The sound of singing birds is music to her ears. Ellen leans down and gently pats her horse on the neck. "Sasha that was a wonderful ride, let's head back, she whispers." Sasha tosses her head as if in agreement, and the two of them begin a gentle stroll back to the barn.
    -SAMANTHA CARTER-

    ReplyDelete
  15. Early mornings on her father’s Montana ranch are the times that Ellen enjoy the most. Just after sunrise, she walks eagerly down the dirt road behind her house to feed the horses. After she feeds them, she saddles up her most favorite mare for a brisk ride. She feels wonderfully alive as she and the horse race across the green fields. The sound of singing birds is music to her ears. Ellen leans down and gently pats her horse on the neck. "Sasha that was a wonderful ride, let's head back, she whispers." Sasha tosses her head as if in agreement and the two of them begin a gentle stroll back to the barn.

    -Michael McKay

    ReplyDelete
  16. Early mornings on her father's Montana ranch are the time that Ellen enjoys the most. Just after sunrise, she walks eagerly, down the dirt road behind her house to feed the horses. after she feeds them, she saddles up her most favorite mare for a brisk ride. She feels wonderfully alive as she and the horse raced across the green fields. The sound of singing birds is music to her ears. Ellen leans down and gently pats her horse on the neck. "Sasha that was a wonderful ride. Let's head back, she whispers." Sasha tosses her head as if in agreement, and the two of them begin a gentle stroll back to the barn.

    Early mornings on her father's Montana ranch is the time that Ellen enjoys the most. Just after sunrise she walks eagerly down the dirt road behind her house to feed the horses. After she feeds them she saddles up her most favorite mare for a brisk ride. She feels wonderfully alive as she and the horse race across the green fields. The sound of singing birds is music to her ears. Ellen leans down and gently pats her horse on the neck. "Sasha that was a wonderful ride let's head back, she whispered." Sasha tosses her head as if in agreement, and the two of them begin a gentle stroll back to the barn.


    Kayla Ormandy

    ReplyDelete
  17. Early mornings on her father's Montana ranch are the time that Ellen enjoys the most. Just after sunrise, she walks eagerly, down the dirt road behind her house to feed the horses. after she feeds them, she saddles up her most favorite mare for a brisk ride. She feels wonderfully alive as she and the horse raced across the green fields. The sound of singing birds is music to her ears. Ellen leans down and gently pats her horse on the neck. "Sasha that was a wonderful ride. Let's head back, she whispers." Sasha tosses her head as if in agreement, and the two of them begin a gentle stroll back to the barn.

    Revised paragraph:
    Early mornings on her father's Montana ranch,are the times that Ellen enjoys the most. Just after sunrise, she walks eagerly down the dirt road behind her house to feed the horses. After she feeds them, she saddles up her most favorite mare for a brisk ride. She feels wonderfully alive as she and the horse race across the green fields. The sound of singing birds is music to her ears. Ellen leans down and gently pats her horse on the neck. "Sasha that was a wonderful ride. Let's head back" she whispers. Sasha tosses her head as if in agreement, and the two of them begin a gentle stroll back to the barn.

    -Nicole Pieta

    ReplyDelete
  18. Early mornings on her father's Montana ranch are the time that Ellen enjoys the most. Just after sunrise, she walks eagerly down the dirt road behind her house to feed the horses. After she feeds them, she saddles up her most favorite mare for a brisk ride. She feels wonderfully alive as she and the horse raced across the green fields. The sound of singing birds is music to her ears. Ellen leans down and gently pats her horse on the neck. "Sasha that was a wonderful ride. Let's head back.¨ she whispers. Sasha tosses her head as if in agreement, and the two of them begin a gentle stroll back to the barn.

    ReplyDelete
  19. (NOT FIXED)Early mornings on her father's Montana ranch are the time that Ellen enjoys the most. Just after sunrise, she walks eagerly, down the dirt road behind her house to feed the horses. after she feeds them, she saddles up her most favorite mare for a brisk ride. She feels wonderfully alive as she and the horse raced across the green fields. The sound of singing birds is music to her ears. Ellen leans down and gently pats her horse on the neck. "Sasha that was a wonderful ride. Let's head back, she whispers." Sasha tosses her head as if in agreement, and the two of them begin a gentle stroll back to the barn.
    (FIXED)Early mornings on her father's Montana ranch are the time that Ellen enjoys the most. Just after sunrise, she walks eagerly down the dirt road behind her house to feed the horses. After she feeds them, she saddles up her most favorite mare for a brisk ride. She feels wonderfully alive as she and the horse raced across the green fields. The sound of singing birds is music to her ears. Ellen leans down and gently pats her horse on the neck. "Sasha that was a wonderful ride, let’s head back" she whispers. Sasha tosses her head as if in agreement, and the two of them begin a gentle stroll back to the barn.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Now that some have been posted, no others will be accepted. I'm going to finish the others that have already been submitted and then post the correctly corrected paragraph. When I'm done with that, I will post the new paragraph for Saturday. Bear with me for a few minutes...

    ReplyDelete
  21. Early mornings on her father's Montana Ranch are the times that Ellen enjoys the most. Just after sunrise, she walks eagerly down the dirt road behind her house to feed the horses. After she feeds them, she saddles up her most favorite mare for a brisk ride. She feels wonderfully alive as she and the horse race across the green fields. The sound of singing birds is music to her ears. Ellen leans down and gently pats her horse on the neck. "Sasha, that was a wonderful ride. Let's head back, she whispers." Sasha tosses her head as if in agreement, and the two of them begin a gentle stroll back to the barn.

    Nicholas Mikelinich

    ReplyDelete
  22. This is the corrected paragraph. Please see me with any questions (or post them here!).

    Early mornings on her father's Montana ranch are the times that Ellen enjoys the most. Just after sunrise, she walks eagerly down the dirt road behind her house to feed the horses. After she feeds them, she saddles up her favorite mare for a brisk ride. She feels wonderfully alive as she and the horse race across the green fields. The sound of singing birds is music to her ears. Ellen leans down and gently pats her horse on the neck. "Sasha, that was a wonderful ride. Let's head back," she whispers. Sasha tosses her head as if in agreement, and the two of them begin a gentle stroll back to the barn.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Early morning , on her father’s Montana Ranch , are the time’s that Ellen enjoys the most .Just after sunrise ,she walks eagerly down the dirt road behind her house to feed the hores.After she feeds them , she saddles up her favorite mare for a brisk ride .She feels wonderfully alive as she and the horses raced across the green fields . The sound of singing birds is music to my ears . Ellen leans down and gentley pats on her horses neck . “Sasha that was a wonderful ride . lets head back “ she wispers . Sasha tosses her head as if in agreement and two of them begin a gentle stroll back to the barn .--- CLAUDIA RUPP /LUNA MIRABELLA x Byee

    ReplyDelete
  24. Hi Claudia,

    This won't count as a grade for you because you posted it after I posted the key. Please make sure to do Sunday's assignment so that you get credit!

    Ms. Sills

    ReplyDelete