Following is a paragraph with approximately 5-7 errors. Please copy and paste the paragraph into the comment box and make all necessary corrections. By the time you post your response, all corrections should have been made.
Please note: this paragraph will change daily. You must complete the editing process for two of the paragraphs this week. That means that you must do the homework on two separate days. There will be no comment back to another student this week, just the two responses. If you complete more than 2 responses, your top two scores will count.
Here is the paragraph:
Most of us have had the experience of playing some kind of video game. We may have played it at an arcade, on a computer, or through a video game system that was plugging into a television set. There is many different types of video games today, but this was not always the case. William Higinbotham an employee of Brookhaven National Laboratory, is thought to be the creator of the first video game. He designs the game in 1958 as an activity for people visiting the laboratory. The game, called "Tennis for two," was much less complicated than the games we have today. Nevertheless, this simply game was the beginning of a giant industry.
Most of us have had the experience of playing some kind of video game. We may have played it at an arcade, on a computer, or through a video game system that was plugged into a television set. There are many different type of video games today, but that was not always the case. William Higinbotham, an employee of Brookhaven National Laboratory is thought to be the creator of the first video game. He designed the game in 1958 as an activity for people visiting the laboratory. The game, called "Tennis for Two," was much less complicated than the games we have today. Nevertheless, this simple game was the beginning of a giant industry.
ReplyDeleteMost of us have had the experience of playing some kind of video game. We may have played it at an arcade, on a computer, or through a video game system that was plugged into a television set. There are many different types of video games today, but this was not always the case. William Higinbotham, an employee of Brookhaven National Laboratory, is thought to be the creator of the first video game. He designed the game in 1958 as an activity for people visiting the laboratory. The game, called "Tennis for Two," was much less complicated than the games we have today. Nevertheless, this simple game was the beginning of a giant industry.
ReplyDeleteMost of us have had the experience of playing some kind of video game. We may have played it at an arcade, on a computer, or through a video game system that is plugged into a television set. There are many different types of video games today, but this was not always the case. William Higinbotham, an employee of Brookhaven National Laboratory, is thought to be the creator of the first video game. He designed the game in 1958 as an activity for people visiting the laboratory. The game, called "Tennis for Two," was much less complicated than the games we have today. Nevertheless, this simple game was the beginning of a giant industry.
ReplyDeleteMost of us have had the experience of playing some kind of video game. We may have played it at an arcade, on a computer, or through a video game system that was pluged into a television set. There is many different types of video games today, but this was not always. William Higinbotham (an employee of Brookhaven National Laboratory) is thought to be the creator of the first video game. He designs the game in 1958 as an activity for people visiting the laboratory. The game, called "Tennis for two,". It was much less complicated than the games we have today. Nevertheless, this simply game was the beginning of a giant industry.
ReplyDeleteMost of us have had the experience of playing some kind of video game. We may have played it at an arcade, on a computer, or through a video game system that was plugged into a television set. There are many different types of video games today, but that was not always the case. William Higinbotham, an employee of Brookhaven National Laboratory, is thought to be the creator of the first video game. He designed the game in 1958 as an activity for people visiting the laboratory. The game, called "Tennis for Two," was much less complicated than the games we have today. Nevertheless, this simple game was the beginning of a giant industry.
ReplyDeleteMost of us have had the experience of playing some kind of video game. We may have played it at an arcade, on a computer, or through a video game system. That was plugged into a television set. There is many different types of today, but this was not always the case. William Higinbotham an employee of Brookhaven National Laboratory, is thought to be the creator of the first video game. He designed the game in 1958 as an activity for people visiting the laboratory. The game called "Tennis for Two" was much less complicated than the games we have today. Never the less, this simple game was the beginning of a giant industry.
ReplyDeleteBefore:
ReplyDeleteMost of us have had the experience of playing some kind of video game. We may have played it at an arcade, on a computer, or through a video game system that was plugging into a television set. There is many different types of video games today, but this was not always the case. William Higinbotham an employee of Brookhaven National Laboratory, is thought to be the creator of the first video game. He designs the game in 1958 as an activity for people visiting the laboratory. The game, called "Tennis for two," was much less complicated than the games we have today. Nevertheless, this simply game was the beginning of a giant industry.
After:
Most of us have had the experience of playing some kind of video game. We may have played it at an arcade,on a computer,or through a video game system that was plugged(1) into a television set. There are(2) many different types of video games today, but this was not always the case. William Higinbotham,(3)an employee of Brookhaven National Laboratory,is thought to be the creator of the first video game. He designed(4) the game in 1958 as an activity for people visiting the laboratory. The game,called "Tennis for Two(5)," was much less coplicated than the games we have today. Nevertheless, this simple(6) game was the beginning of a giant industry.
(indent)Most of us have had the experience of playing some kind of video game. We may have played it at an arcade, on a computer, or through a video game system that was plugged into a television set. There are many different types of video games today, but this was not always the case. William Higinbotham, an employee of Brookhaven National Laboratory, is thought to be the creator of the first video game. He designed the game in 1958 as an activity for people visiting the laboratory. The game, called "Tennis for two," was much less complicated than the games we have today. Nevertheless, this simple game was the beginning of a giant industry.
ReplyDeleteMost of us have had the expierience of playing some kind of video game. We may have played it at an arcade, on a computer, or through a video game system that was plugged into a telebision set.There is ,amy different types of video games today,but this was not always the case. William Higinbotham, an employee at Brookhaven National Laboratory, is though to be the creator of the forst video game. He designed the game in 1985 as an activity for people visiting the labrotory. The game called "Tennis for Two" was much less complicated then the games we have today. Nevertheless, this simple game was the begining of the industry
ReplyDeleteMost of us have had the experience of playing some kind of video game. We may have played it at an arcade, on a computer, or through a video game system that was plugged into a television set. There is many different types of video games today, but this was not always the case. William Higinbotham an employee of Brookhaven National Laboratory, is thought to be the creator of the first video game. He designed the game in 1958 as an activity for people visiting the laboratory. The game, called "Tennis for two" was much less complicated than the games we have today. Nevertheless, this simple game was the beginning of a giant industry.
ReplyDeleteMost of us had some kind of experience of playing some kind of video game. We may have played it at an arcade, on a computer, or through a video game system that was plugged into the telivision set. There are many different types of video games, but this was not always the case. William Higinbotham, an employee of the Brookhaven National Laboratory, is thought to be the creator of the first video game. He designed the game in 1958 as an actvity for people visiting the laboratory. The game called, " Tennis for Two," was much less complicated than the games we have today. Nevertheless, this simple game was the beginningof a giant industry.
ReplyDeleteMost of us have had the experience of playing some kind of video game. We may have played it at an arcade, on a computer, or through a video game system that was plugging into a television set. There is many different types of video games today, but this was not always the case. William Higinbotham an employee of Brookhaven National Laboratory, is thought to be the creator of the first video game. He designs the game in 1958 as an activity for people visiting the laboratory. The game, called "Tennis for two," was much less complicated than the games we have today. Nevertheless, this simply game was the beginning of a giant industry.
ReplyDeleteMost of us have had the experience of playing some kind of video game. We may have played it at an arcade, on a computer, or through a video game system that was plugged into a television set. There are many different types of video games today, but this was not always the case. William Higinbotham, an employee of Brookhaven National Laboratory is thought to be the creator of the first video game. He designed the game in 1958 as an activity for people visiting the laboratory. The game was called tennis for two and was much less complicated than the games we have today. Nevertheless this simple game was the beginning of a giant industry.
Kayla Ormandy
Most of us have had the experience of playing some kind of video game. We may have played it at an arcade, on a computer, or through a video game system that was plugging into a television set. There are many different types of video games today, but this was not always the case. William Higginbotham an employee of Brookhaven National Laboratory is thought to be the creator of the first video game. He designs the game in 1958 as an activity for people visiting the laboratory. The game, called "Tennis for two," was much less complicated than the games we have today. Nevertheless, this simply game was the beginning of a giant industry.
ReplyDeleteMost of us have the experience of playing some kind of video. We may have played it at an arcade, on a computer, or through a video game system that was plugged into a television set. There are many different types of video games today, but this was not always the case. William Higinbotham, an employee of Brook Haven National laboratory, is thought to be the creator of the first video game. He designed the game in 1958 as an activity for people visiting the laboratory. the games, called "Tennis for two," was much less complicated than the games we have today.Nevertheless, this simple game was the beginning of a giant industry.
ReplyDeleteMost of us have had the experience of playing some kind of video game. We may have played it at an arcade, on a computer, or through a video game system that was plugging into a television set. There are many different types of video games today, but this was not always the case. William Higginbotham an employee of Brookhaven National Laboratory is thought to be the creator of the first video game. He designs the game in 1958 as an activity for people visiting the laboratory. The game, called "Tennis for Two," was much less complicated than the games we have today. Nevertheless, this simple game was the beginning of a giant industry.
ReplyDeleteMost of us have had the experience of playing some kind of video game. We may have played it at an arcade, on a computer, or through a video game system that was plugged into a television set. There are many different types of video games today, but this was not always the case. William Higinbotham, an employee of Brookhaven National Laboratory, is thought to be the creator of the first video game. He designed the game in 1958 as an activity for people visiting the laboratory. The game, called Tennis for Two, was much less complicated than the games we have today. Nevertheless, this simple game was the beginning of a giant industry.
ReplyDeleteMost of us have had the experience of playing some kind of video game. We may have played it at an arcade, on a computer, or through a video game system that was plugged into a television set. There are many different types of video games today, but this was not always the case. William Higinbotham an employee of Brookhaven National Laboratory, is thought to be the creator of the first video game. He designed the game in 1958 as an activity for people visiting the laboratory. The game, called "Tennis for two." It was much less complicated than the games we have today. Nevertheless, this simple game was the beginning of a giant industry.
ReplyDeleteMost of us have had the experience of playing some kind of video game. We may have played it at an arcade, on a computer, or through a video game system that was plugged into a television set. There are many different types of video games today, but this was not always the case. William Higinbotham, an employee of Brookhaven National Laboratory, is thought to be the creator of the first video game. He designed the game in 1958 as an activity for people visiting the laboratory. The game, called "Tennis for Two," was much less complicated than the games we have today. Nevertheless, this simple game was the beginning of a giant industry.
ReplyDeleteMost of us have had the experience of playing some kind of video game. We may have played it at an arcade, on a computer, or through a video game system that was plugging into a television set. Their is many different types of video games today, but this was not always the case. William Higinbotham a employee of Brookhaven National Laboratory, is thought to be the creator of the first video game. He designed the game in 1958 as an activity for people visiting the laboratory. The game called "Tennis for two," was much less complicated than the games we have today. Nevertheless, this simple game was the beginning of a giant industry.
ReplyDeleteMost of us have had the experience of playing some kind of video game. We may have played it at an arcade, on a computer, or through a video game system that was plugging into a television set. There is many different types of video games today, but this was not always the case. William Higinbotham an employee of Brookhaven National Laboratory, is thought to be the creator of the first video game. He designs the game in 1958 as an activity for people visiting the laboratory. The game, called "Tennis for two," was much less complicated than the games we have today. Nevertheless, this simply game was the beginning of a giant industry.
ReplyDeleteEdited:
Most of us have had the experience of playing some kind of video game. We may have played it at an arcade, on a computer, or through a video game system that was plugged into a television set. There is many different types of video games today, but this was not always the case. William Higinbotham an employee of Brookhaven National Laboratory, is thought to be the creator of the first video game. He designed the game in 1958 as an activity for people visiting the laboratory. The game, called "Tennis for two," was much less complicated than the games we have today. Nevertheless, this simple game was the beginning of a giant industry.
Ms.Sills
ReplyDeleteThis is a redo for a better grade.
Most of us have had the experience of playing some kind of video game. We may have played it at an arcade, on a computer, or through a video game system that was plugging into a television set. There is many different types of video games today, but this was not always the case. William Higinbotham an employee of Brookhaven National Laboratory, is thought to be the creator of the first video game. He designs the game in 1958 as an activity for people visiting the laboratory. The game, called "Tennis for two," was much less complicated than the games we have today. Nevertheless, this simply game was the beginning of a giant industry.
Edited Version:
Most of us have had the experience of playing some kind of video game. We may have played it at an arcade, on a computer, or through a video game system that was plugged into a television set. There are many different types of video games today, but this was not always the case. William Higinbotham an employee of Brookhaven National Laboratory, is thought to be the creator of the first video game. He designed the game in 1958 as an activity for people visiting the laboratory. The game, called "Tennis For Two," was much less complicated than the games we have today. Nevertheless, this simple game was the beginning of a giant industry.
Most of us have had the experience of playing some kind of video game. We may have played it at an arcade, on a computer, or through a video game system that was plugging into a television set. There is many different types of video games today, but this was not always the case. William Higinbotham an employee of Brookhaven National Laboratory, is thought to be the creator of the first video game. He designs the game in 1958 as an activity for people visiting the laboratory. The game, called "Tennis for two," was much less complicated than the games we have today. Nevertheless, this simply game was the beginning of a giant industry.
ReplyDeleteMost of us have had the experience of playing some kind of video game. We may have played it at an arcade, on a computer, or through a video game system that was plugged into a television set. There is many different types of video games today, but this was not always the case. William Higinbotham an employee of Brookhaven National Laboratory, is thought to be the creator of the first video game. He designed the game in 1958 as an activity for people visiting the laboratory. The game, called "Tennis for two," was much less complicated than the games we have today. Never the less, this game was the beginning of a giant industry.
Most of us have had the experience of playing some kind of video game. We may have played it at an arcade, on a computer, or through a video game system that was plugged into a television set. There are many different types of video games today, but this was not always the case. William Higinbotham, an employee of Brookhaven National Laboratory, is thought to be the creator of the first video game. He designed the game in 1958 as an activity for people visiting the laboratory. The game, called "Tennis for Two," was much less complicated than the games we have today. Nevertheless, this simple game was the beginning of a giant industry.
ReplyDeleteMost of us have had the experience of playing some kind of video game. We may have played it at an arcade, on a computer, or through a video game system that was plugged into a television set. There are many different types of video games today, but this was not always the case. William Higinbotham an employee of Brookhaven National Laboratory, was thought to be the creator of the first video game. He designed the game in 1958 as an activity for people visiting the laboratory. The game, called "Tennis For Two," was much less complicated than the games we have today. Nevertheless, this simple game was the beginning of a giant industry.
ReplyDeleteMost of us have had the experience of playing some kind of video game. We may have played it at an arcade, on a computer, or through a video game system that was plugged into a television set. There are many different types of video games today, but this was not always the case. William Higinbotham, an employee at Brookhaven National Laboratory, is thought to be the creator of the first video game. He designed the game in 1958 as an activity for people visiting the laboratory. The game, called "Tennis for Two", was much less complicated than the games we have today. Nevertheless, this simple game was the beginning of a giant industry.
ReplyDeleteHere is the corrected paragraph:
ReplyDeleteMost of us have had the experience of playing some kind of video game. We may have played it at an arcade, on a computer, or through a video game system that was plugged into a television set. There are many different types of video games today, but this was not always the case. William Higinbotham, an employee of Brookhaven National Laboratory, is thought to be the creator of the first video game. He designed the game in 1958 as an activity for people visiting the laboratory. The game, called "Tennis for Two," was much less complicated than the games we have today. Nevertheless, this simple game was the beginning of a giant industry.
There are two sentences, the one that starts with "William" and the one that starts with "The game," that have dependent clauses. (The sentence that I just wrote has a dependent clause, too.) This means that what's in between the commas could not stand as its own sentence and make sense. But if the dependent clause were removed, then what remains of the sentence would make sense. That's why we needed to add a comma after Higinbotham; that comma shows the beginning of the dependent clause.
If you have any other questions, please see me.
Most of us have had the experience of playing some kind of video game. We may have played it at an arcade, on a computer, or through a video game system that was plugged into a television set. There is many different types of video games today, but this was not always the case. William Higinbotham an employee of Brookhaven National Laboratory, is thought to be the creator of the first video game. He designs the game in 1958 as an activity for people visiting the laboratory. The game, called "Tennis for two," was much less complicated than the games we have today. Nevertheless, this simple game was the beginning of a giant industry.
ReplyDeleteDidn't notice that many mistakes in this one, but I was attracted to it since I like video games-I even have the original "Atari".
NEVER quit before saving,
-Emily Green X Artemis Luna
Emily,
ReplyDeleteYour homework didn't count. As I said in class, you must do the current day's work. Once other student work has been posted, that blog is "closed." I'm about to post the Saturday homework. Please complete that one; do Sunday's, too, if you like.
Ms. Sills